Welcome In to Soul Café

We’re officially in a New Moon, South Node eclipse week, and the message I’ve got for you is one of discovering or rediscovering our true selves by letting old identities and old narratives die so that our more embodied authenticity can emerge.

We are also talking about birds today because 1) They are a beautiful metaphor and teacher in many ways, and 2) I’ve become an instant birding fan. Really the only difference between birding and how I typically go about my day is that now I have binoculars! Lol

Meet me for an upcoming author talk and book signing in a city near you!

More events listed here.

For awhile I was under the impression that after having been single for all but 6 months of my life that I needed to try committed partnership to catalyze a new chapter of learning and personal growth. I told myself, I’ve learned as much as there is to learn as a single person. It reminds me of a famous relationship expert who insists we only learn about ourselves in relationships, and she meant romantic relationships specifically. I thought she was wrong back when I heard that, and now I know I was also wrong (surprisingly 😜).

One of the first messages I channeled for this week’s Refill was this:

It’s about simply being present for whatever is happening in your life. That’ how we learn. It’s not about needing certain types of experiences to learn. No, any experience can be one of healing, learning, and growth if it’s your mindset and openness to let it be so.

It’s the same message from Octavia Butler that I quote in chapter 6 of my book: “Your teachers are all around you, all that you perceive, all that you experience … will teach you—if you will learn.” Emphasis mine.

I’m understanding “all that you perceive” more deeply since I tried birding for the first time last month with a dope community of folks in Brooklyn. For starters, the use of binoculars literally changes how much you’re able to perceive, to look closely at the world in wonder and wonder… I saw the beauty of birds literally like I’d never seen them before. That experience alone instantly and permanently changed me the moment the outstretched wings and rippling feathers of a Red-Tailed Hawk soaring high above came into focus through my new lens.

As we walked, experienced birders were listening for specific bird songs and then searching to locate the bird once we heard it. The group, which was sizable, had to stand in collective silence, listening… closely. Looking… closely. Standing… closely… in hushed anticipation of glimpsing something beautiful. Birding truly teaches a different way of being present to the present.

It’s about simply being present for whatever is happening in your life. That’ how we learn.

The creatures we saw in the sky, tress, and lakes were magical to me. The other magic of that day was viscerally experiencing collective awe and wonder, communal joy and delight. I distinctly remember at one point recognizing this when we came upon a Spotted Woodpecker and we collectively gasped and went woooowwww. That moment dilated my heart chakra.

Inspired by my new hobby, I pulled us some oracle cards from my first oracle deck, The Divine Feather Messenger. This will likely be my last use of these cards before I gift them to a friend. I wanted three, of course. Each has a nice message on their own, but the synthesis of these three messages forms the basis of this week’s wisdom.

Blue Jay - “The time is right to access and master your abilities. Do so with humility and control. True mastery lies in the integration of all the qualities, skills and traits you possess and using them appropriately.”

Meadowlark - “Smile. You will soon experience a wonderful journey of inner discovery. This experience may be connected to your spiritual path, your intuition or a greater sense of self-knowing. It can also be an unfolding of inner creativity and new projects. What is it that makes you smile. Use your sense of playfulness, too, in this discovery.”

White Owl - “The wisdom and messages of the divine are within you. Awakens a keener sense of listening, seeing, sensing and knowing [birding does this too!]. Follow your intuition. Follow the guidance that asks only for the best and highest good for all.”

What really helped me release the notion that partnership was the next best path for my learning, self-discovery, and growth, was the realization that I am currently already very deep into a journey of learning, self-discovery, and growth and always have been!!

It probably should have been obvious, but it wasn’t, okay! Lol. It’s like looking for your cellphone while it’s in your hand or you’re talking on it. Anyone else? Just me?? Lol.

What our Oracle friends the Blue Jay, Meadowlark, and White Owl teach us now is that we always have an opportunity to learn and discover more about ourselves through the expression of our personalities, our hobbies, our interests, pursuit of our of dreams visions and goals, honing our intuition, developing and using our spiritual gifts, connecting more deeply with our soul selves that exist beyond the physical dimension, and so much more, anything and everything.

With this week’s eclipse, a new moon on the South Node, we are in the tarot territory of the Death card followed by the Ace of Wands card. The meaning: “Every new beginning comes from some other beginning’s end.” (“Closing Time” by Semisonic, 1998)

For many of us, this ending could be an internal shift in belief, awareness, or consciousness, like the end of my belief about what my learning and growth had to look like. You could be letting go of an old idea, a limited belief, an identity that no longer fits the dimensions of your current consciousness. Ego death simply means a transformation in who or what you understand yourself to be. This liberates you to discover more of yourself, more of who you truly are away from other people’s narratives or expectations or influences, to discover more of who you’re becoming even if you’re not clear about who or what that is yet.

Remember that major astrology events like eclipses don’t just resonate on the exact day. Whatever this corresponds to in your life could’ve started playing out months ago and could very well continue to unfold for months to come.

The important thing you can do no matter what’s happening in the sky or here on Earth is simply being present for whatever is happening in your life. That’ how we learn.

If you’d like a 1-on-1 session with me, book a Coffee Date!

ad break

It's the easiest way to get bestselling ebooks for just $2. This free website is designed to help readers discover books they'll love at a huge discount — and more than 15 million readers have already joined. If you read ebooks, this is a website you need to know about.

Learn the secret to saving

Get your own deck here.

Meadowlark Journal Prompt: WHAT MAKES YOU SMILE?

Blue Jay Affirmation - “I reclaim all parts of myself and open to my highest potential.”

Meadowlark Affirmation - “I choose to treasure the welcome gift of my own inner light.”

White Owl Affirmation - “I honor the messages and guidance of the divine that arise within me.”

Cynthia Erivo’s voice on this cover song drew me in and got me playing it on a loop all day. And then I heard the lyrics and have crowned this song as my new summer anthem.

In the Acknowledgments of my book I write:

Most people might hear these lyrics and think about an external relationship with another person. I translate, “I knew you were waiting for me,” as my future self waiting for me on the other side of challenging times, looking out with immense pride and gratitude that I persevered, that I kept going.

There’s a future version of you, too, who’s already proud of how you navigate this present moment.